Quotes
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Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink." "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it." <em>Exchange between Lady Astor and Winston Churchill—</em>
I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was."
When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness.